TV vs. Daycare

(Both Worked for Me, Only One Did for the Princess)

When Carson was first born until he was 2 ½, he stayed home all day with me. Our day was filled with dirty diapers, lots of feedings, burping and changes of clothes … for me. I discovered that using a burp cloth is a good idea. It also requires more skill than accounting and recruiting. I only had to change clothes once a day in those gigs. I must have changed shirts at least twice on really bad days. You never realize just how bad food smells coming out of the human body until you have a baby. And it does nothing for Ralph Lauren. I ruined many good shirts with reused mommy milk and Gerber’s sweet potatoes baby food.

Anyway, I digress. As Carson was taking naps, I discovered the Game Channel with reruns of all my favorite shows from the 70’s like Match Game and Family Feud. And I discovered every poker show known to man. Carson knew what a royal flush was long before he learned how to flush his own potty. He actually loved watching those shows until he grew old enough to communicate. Then I became well versed in Diego and Blues Clues. I didn’t mind watching his shows because he didn’t mind watching mine.

All was happy in SAHD land until the Princess realized Carson could use the remote control better than she could. One day she wanted to switch the TV from DVD to cable. Although I had patiently explained how to do this many times in the past, she still couldn’t. When Carson did it before he was 12 months old, which was a few months before he could walk, and still 12 months away before the Princess could do it, we had the proverbial “Come to Princess” talk. Yes the talk about our son watching too much TV was held.

She reminded me of the theory that too much TV was potentially causing autism. I suggested it might be something else. Another “man mistake.” I just can’t help it. I am a man. I just operate in a woman’s world.

After a night on the couch, I agreed it was possible that too much TV causes autism, and we resumed our conversation. She and I discussed the merits of TV compared to quality time teaching our son things like how to walk, reading him books, teaching him how to color and how to go to the potty. When I suggested that Blue’s Clues and Diego were educational, I earned another night on the couch to rethink my position.

Well you may have to teach me twice, but never three times. I readily agreed that we needed to do something. So I asked her what her plan was. Now I suppose I should have acted like the executive I had been and presented her with the plan, but I just assumed that parenthood was the mommy’s domain and she is the executive, so I was all ears.

After another night on the couch, I had a brilliant idea to use her idea and talk about daycare. It was something she had discussed before because Carson’s cousins Eric and Andrew were in it part time and they were thriving. I had never been open to it because I liked having him home with me. Okay, perhaps I also liked my gig of changing a few diapers in exchange for the Game Show Network. Unlike me, I know you, my reader (and probably friend or family member), are not an idiot and already had it figured out, so why not come clean.

The other reason I just assumed it meant I was a failure at this gig. And in many ways, I was/am. But I had to admit that Carson needed a true teacher in order to keep up. When I went to kindergarten twenty, okay forty, years ago you learned the basics like ABC’s and how to count to five. Nowadays they better be reading books that I didn’t read until first or second grade. Carson can count to 100 in English and twenty in Spanish. Not sure when I learned that, but it wasn’t at age four.

So just like the 12 Steps Program for AA, I came to admit that I needed help. And I began to look at my failures and how a daycare program, for Carson, could help. But that’s another story.